Xena: Warrior Princess (the Vampire Slayer?)

I've been meaning to write a post about Xena: Warrior Princess for several months now. I haven't actually watched the series in a while. But I finally figured out what I wanted to say.

So for some context, this post is also going to be a bit about Buffy the Vampire Slayer. But I'm only about 1.5 seasons into that quite long show, so it may get its own post later. If you were not already aware, I am a co-host on a podcast, Whedon from the Chaff, wich my good friend Kaitlyn, in which we watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and other works of Joss Whedon (although we haven't gotten to those yet) and talk about it from a feminist perspective. A lot of it becomes a critique of the 90s. Because a lot of it becomes a review of what was deemed socially acceptable to put on TV aimed at teens in the 90s. Which was a lot. And a whole lot of that was not great stuff. There's a lot of casual unnoticed sexism in a show ostensibly about a female action hero. But again, I'm not here just to rant on Buffy. That's what the podcast is for ;)  - really tho we try to see the good and the bad of that show, and spend our time talking about how to improve it. (A word to anyone interested in listening to this podcast: It is not a vulgarity-free space. Also we're not super consistent at updating. It's a fun project between friends.)

But anyway there is a story behind why I'm talking about Buffy in order to talk about Xena. You see, I never watched Xena growing up. I was a bit too young for it when it was coming out (I was 2 years old when it launched, 8 when it finished). And honestly I hadn't ever given it a thought - hadn't even really heard of it. Buffy I had heard of, just never gotten around too. So when Kaitlyn had the idea for the podcast, I was ready to watch Buffy. But we had to delay, for one reason of for another - I was moving, she was working, I was looking for work, etc. And especially while I was unemployed between moving home from Oxford and finding my first seasonal work in the States, I had a lot of time to kill, but couldn't watch Buffy yet because I was waiting to start the podcast. I honestly don't remember why I decided that I would fill that time by watching Xena. I wanted something that I felt would provide me with some context for Buffy. A show from the same time frame with the same target audience. Xena was from the 90s and had a female lead and was considered progressive. So I gave it a shot.

I won't lie, the first season was ROUGH. The absolute lack of budget, and the writers who didn't really know how to write Xena, only how to write Hercules, made for several episodes of "why am I watching this?". I never actually got to watch Hercules, of which Xena is a spin off, either. I still haven't seen the actually first episodes of Xena's character, because Hercules isn't on Hulu. But yes, the first season was rough. There were compound bows dressed up like shortbows. There was the great city of Amphipolis, made from two small huts and some palm trees. The combat in early Xena was very clearly influenced by the Power Rangers. (I actually really love watching the development of combat through shows like this, as it changes drastically over time). The plot is extremely episodic, but slowly introduces characters and themes which will become important. There is the relationship between Xena and Gabrielle, of course. There is the concept of blood innocence, and characters like Ares, the Amazons, and Autolycus. The show slowly builds itself without really letting on how important all of these will be in later plotlines. It was around episode 21 - Ok, it was exactly episode 21 - when I started to really care, and realized I really liked the show and the characters. Episode 21 is the first episode where it appears, for a time, that one of our leading ladies has died, and we see the other's grief and rage over it. She doesn't stay dead, of course, but the sharp look into the character's relationship made me realize suddenly that I CARED. After that, I was in love. The fact that the OTHER of our leading ladies dies-but-doesn't 3 episodes later helped.

Season one's final few episodes is when the Plot with a capital P finally starts showing up, with Callisto and Joxer and more Callisto showing up. It's still episodic, and there are still some filler episodes for sure, but by then you care about and love the characters, and their relationship. So much so that by the time season three comes around and they have Conflict and lots of it, it's absolutely heart wrenching. Which of course in turn makes their reunion - in my two very favorite Xena episodes of all time, 3.12 and 3.13, The Bitter Suite and One Against an Army (you know it's bad when you know the numbers without looking them up) - even better. Season four is fun mostly because their relationship is so established and stable at that point, and it's ending, although tragic, was actually quite good. I can see how the show intended to end there. BUT then they got a load more funding, and so we got seasons 5 and 6! Aka "the one where Lucy was pregnant" and "the one set later in time". These two seasons really started to use up every idea they had, which gave some hilarious episodes, some very good episodes, and only one or two quite bad to the point they shouldn't be watched (looking at you, Married with Fishsticks). The fact that I watched the Norse trilogy about the same time Thor: Ragnarok came out and I played Helblade: Senua's Sacrifice is a big part of why this Norse TTRPG I'm running came about. But I digress.

The reason I waited so long to post about Xena, though, despite finishing the series over a year ago, is that I didn't REALLY know what to say about it besides "hey I like this a lot!" Which, to be honest, is a fine thing to say, so I don't know why that stopped me. In any case, I've been trying to figure out what it is that I like about Xena, so I can point that out. I think I finally stumbled upon it. And I think it's a lot more relevant than I was expecting.

I thought the thing I liked about Xena was it's playful use of mythology and it's fictionalized and low-budget ancient Greece - already a favorite setting for me. I thought what I liked was it's well built and lovable characters - heroes and villians alike. I thought what I liked was how it is so unashamed of having a female heroine who is never questioned or called "just" a girl. Who is a strong, unquestionably capable hero, who is also introspective, who carries a burden, who is looking for more, and who not only has a sexuality, but whose sexuality is very much a part of her character in a way that SHE owns, not those around her, or even the expected audience. And I do like all of those things. But the main thing I love about Xena: Warrior Princess has to be the relationship between Xena and Gabrielle, and, more importantly, the example it is for others.

Now there have been many Opinions about this relationship, so I wanted to focus on what it is about the relationship that I like. But I can address the obvious first. Xena and Gabrielle are very obviously best friends. Are they also a couple? are they, as the show at one point explicitly asks and does not answer, lovers? Probably. I think the show is written that way. In fact I don't think there is much question that it's written that way, as much as it could be in the late 90s. They kiss like five times, and are confirmed in canon as "soulmates". Gabrielle is referred to (jokingly) as the father, and (seriously) as the co-parent of Xena's child. The semi-finale of the show involves them reading Sappho's poetry to each other. Especially if you know about any of the content which was proposed and cut from the show, I think that's the only way you can read this. And I think it works very well. I think they did it very tastefully. BUT whether they are together in that way or not - and I do think there are people who read it both ways and I think that's ok. I think the show was designed to be read multiple ways - I still love their relationship. But I've had trouble pinning down why. And then yesterday I was talking with a friend about Buffy, and it hit me.

If you've listened to our Buffy podcast, you've heard Kaitlyn and I having several different issues with the relationships in Buffy. But one of the most sinister, one of the ones that bothers me the most, isn't a problem of sexism, and it's a problem with rape culture, and isn't a problem with adult men attempting to write teenage girls. It's a problem with friendship. There are times when it feels like the writers of Buffy have never known what it feels like to have friends. While the writers of Xena knows what it's like to have friends, sisters, spouses, whatever you want to call them. Buffy - or the part of it I've seen so far - paints a type of love and friendship I don't know that I actually want. While Xena paints one I love. And the biggest difference I can point out in them is this: The relationships in Buffy are greedy and negative, while in Xena they are giving and positive.

Now what do I mean by that? In Buffy, all of the main characters face a lot of hardship, including a lot of self-doubt and societal pressure. They're teens! And their friends are there for them. This I like. I am not critiquing the gang's loyalty or the trials they face. But I don't appreciate the WAY in which they "help" their friends. Because in Buffy, when Xander and Willow want Buffy to feel better about herself, how do they do it? They do it by letting Buffy know how much better she is than other people. They do it not by praising Buffy specifically, but by insulting everyone else. For the first season or so, the entire function of Cordelia seems to be to be someone who is insulted and belittled by the gang to make Buffy feel better. When Buffy gets anxious about how she might not compare to the many girls Angel has been around in his long life, does he reassure her by praising her? No. He reassures her by insulting all those other girls (who I will add aren't even here to hear it. None of them ever are). Even when Buffy is trying to built people up, the only way it knows how to do that is punching down. And it makes me really sad. (I will say as an aside right fast: One of the characters who does this the least is Giles. And it's one of the reasons he is my absolute favorite character. It also may be because he is an Adult.)

Xena, on the other hand, I realized when comparing it to Buffy, always builds up. When Gabrielle needs encouraging, Xena encourages her. She doesn't say "you don't suck as much as those OTHER girls". She says "You are good and I like you." Same for Xena, and all of the other characters. Xena is, essentially, a six season long show about two women constantly looking at each other and verbalizing their love and appreciation of each other. Xena is a stream of "you're awesome, I love you, I like being around you, I am here for you, I appreciate you, you amaze me, I love this specific thing about you, you are so good." Even when its characters screw up, the focus is on how they are improving, and are improving each other. Even when they ARE surrounded by characters like Joxer - the tag-along screw-up of a "hero" with a good heart but a silly head and clumsy everything. They don't punch down. Joxer is loveable, and becomes more and more of a character over time. His shortcomings aren't "fixed" either. They are embraced, and he is never an "at least you're not like him" character. In fact, I think the only person on the show who ever DOES try to build Xena up BY punching down at other people and other women is Ares - it's part of his corrupting influence, and a clear example of the way he thinks. It's part of what sets heroes and villains apart on this show. The difference is NOT whether or not they love Xena and say it. It's HOW they love Xena and how they say it. Gabrielle loves Xena for being Xena, while Ares loves Xena for being not-everyone-else. Gabrielle points out all the good in Xena. Ares points out all of the flaws in the rest of the world.

I don't mean this to be a hate-on-Buffy post. And I certainly don't want to fall into the same exact behavior I am critiquing the show for! But the comparison is, I think, useful and interesting. Xena is encouraging, uplifting, and full of love. It is optimistic about love overcoming any obstacle (whether you see it as romantic or platonic love). In comparison Buffy seems cynical and distracted, like you'll just have to settle for the snarky friendship you can get. Is this more realistic? More like a high-school? Perhaps it is. But I don't know anyone who would rather model their life and love after a high school. And although I know this is a much bigger debate than I can have here, I DO think that there is a strong case for calling on shows like Buffy to be aspriatoinal - to be shows which call us to be better by showing us what it looks like to be better. Not just being mirrors than normalize for us things which we really ought to change in ourselves. Especially when you consider the target audience of both shows. People in that audience are trying to figure out who they are and who they should be. And spending time with friends who treat each other like Xena and Gabrielle treat each other is, I think, far more healthy than spending time with friends who treat each other like Buffy, Xander, and Willow treats each other - and treat the rest of the world. And in the end, that is what you're doing when you watch through a show like this. Or like Friends or any other show like this. You are spending time with people. Make sure that those are good people. The type of people you would be friends with in real life. The type of people who make your life better, and make you better too.

Bottom line is this: If the only way you have of building someone up is knocking someone else down, then you're doing it wrong. You aren't constructive. You are destructive. You aren't allowing your friend to be seen. You aren't even looking at them. One of the most powerful things we can do in community is to bear witness to each other. To be with one another and say "I see you, and I love you." And that is NOT the same as "At least you're better than those other losers over there, have you seen them?". "You are good" is not the same as "You're not bad". Xena, as a show, understands this deeply, and even uses it to structure the rightly-ordered constructive love of Gabrielle and the dis-ordered destructive love of Ares. In fact, if you want an example of healthy and toxic relationships, these two are a wonderful example. Xena: Warrior Princess is in many ways structured around the triangle of Gabrielle-Xena-Ares. It's one of the reasons the show runners never wanted to confirm that Xena and Gabrielle were lovers - because they felt it would end all tension between Xena and Ares. Xena's story is all about overcoming her dark past into a brighter future - of moving away from the very temping and familiar and fiery love of Ares, in all it's power, lust, and ambition, and towards Gabrielle's love, which is selfless and inspiring and strong. Xena goes back and forth between them at times, but it's very clear which one is good for her, and which one is not.

Another way to state all of this is to repeat something that I mentioned earlier: The concept of "not like other girls". It's a terrible, harmful concept that somehow has wormed its way into becoming a standard, internalized, accepted part of culture. It is sexism at, if not its most destructive than perhaps its most deceptive. And it's really interesting how these two shows approach the concept. Buffy is, in a since, made to be much more relateable. She is a teenage highschooler, with highschooler problems. But she is also "not like other girls" in that she's the Slayer. This is not the type of problem I'm talking about though. That's just "chosen-one" plot. I'm talking about when she's "not like other girls" in that she's strong and smart and cares about the right things. THAT kind of talk is the insidious voice that normalizes the idea that women in general are NOT expected to be strong and smart and care about the right things. And it's the exception to the rule that should be lauded. Xena on the other hand is an adult woman and lives in a very different world. She is "not like other girls" in that she is a successful warlord who may or may not be a demigod (I buy into the idea that Ares is her father even if no one else does including both of them). But these are not really the aspects of her which are to be lauded. Everything about Xena that is lauded is lauded as not an exception to the rule, but an example to follow. Xena is great and you can be too. It almost feels like if everyone was more like Xena, or more like Gabrielle, then the world would be a better place, and Xena and Gabrielle would be the people most happy about it. Whereas if everyone were like Buffy, Buffy and co would be the most dissapointed of all. "If everyone is super", the show seems to say "then no one is".

The final aspect of this I wanted to address was some of the reasoning behind the way the Buffy crew operate, which I also dislike and which I see not only in fiction but in people a LOT. I think one of the reasons that the characters in Buffy are resistant to build up - to name what is good in their friends and not just what is bad in others - is a twisted since of shame. Culture these days has somehow built up an underlying since of shame in saying truth and shame in being earnest. And Buffy's characters really embrace this, while Xena's defy it. This again could be said to be based on the fact that Buffy is teens, unsure of themselves and the world, while Xena is adult characters. But again: reflection is only useful if it is not painted as if it is an aspiration. I don't really know WHY people, especially teens, seem to have a sense of shame and needed reserve when expressing love and positivity towards people and things which they love. But I think it is a societal evil which needs to be resisted and overcome. I think the crew of Buffy DO think the world of her, but they don't SAY it. And they should.

Thank you for reading this rather long post. I apologize again for being so negative towards a show I'm only 1.5 seasons into, especially as I am critiquing IT for being negative. I am sure there is a lot of good in Buffy that I haven't seen. I'm sure that it DID encourage many teenagers and there were a lot of people, esp. girls, who needed Buffy. If you love Buffy, I don't want to take that from you. In fact I would love to hear what it is you love about Buffy. What I AM saying is this: Treat your friends even better than how Buffy and co. treat one another. And if you want a wonderful example of what that might look like, maybe watch Xena. If you have read all the way to this point than here's the point: Go be good to your friends! Go built people up, and don't do it by tearing others down. Praise people for being better than their previous selves, not for being better than other people around them. Verbalize what you love about the people you care about, and never punch down.

I have a LOT more thoughts about Xena, if anyone wants to chat about it. But this post is long enough as it is. TL;DR: Xena and Gabrielle are icons not only because they love each other but because they love each other well. They build each other up, they communicate their love, and aren't ashamed to do so. All of these are lessons I, and society I think, need to learn. Yes, Xena is cheesy and low budget at times. But if you mock it for being cheesy and positive, while Buffy is more cynical, I think there is something wrong.

Thanks for reading!

R

Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise him all creatures here below. Praise him above ye heavenly hosts. Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Amen.

The Graveyard Book

It's been a while since I've written - this sentiment feels like an obligatory admission at this point - and there is so much I could write on. There's video games, for a start - I've been playing Assassin's Creed Odyssey and God of War, both really wonderful. It's been a terrific year for mythology. And speaking of that, there is Neil Gaiman's book on Norse Mythology - an audiobook I've heard at LEAST twice, a book I've read, and now a radio drama I've heard two and a half times as well! (If you have even the least interest in myth or in radio drama, I will provide a link here, as it won't be online forever. If you're reading this within 20 or so days of posting, please go here. It's only an hour and a half and well worth it: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0001rjt ). But it's always easiest to write just after being immersed in the words of a great author. And I've spent several hours over the last few days and now this morning doing just that, listening to Neil Gaiman read another of his works, The Graveyard Book.

I don't have that much to say about it, honesty. I wrote a short review for my friends, and thought that while I was on the subject, I might as well post it here.

The Graveyard Book, if you want a summary, is about a young boy who is adopted by a family of ghosts. Adopted by a graveyard as a whole you might say. A living boy raised by the dead. It has been described as a children's book, and I've seen it published with pictures and all. I suppose it is that. A Young Adult Novel, most certainly. It ticks those boxes. But it really does feel quite timeless. I haven't actually ready Kipling's The Jungle Book, upon which it is somewhat based, and definitely inspired. But as that is a classic, this feels somewhat the same. As I wrote to my friends, the reason my mind hesitates to call it what it is, a Young Adult Novel, is how it sidesteps the shortcomings of the genre. Not the least by it's length.

The Graveyard Book is only 8 chapters. It's about 8 hours as well, if you hear it the way I did. But more importantly, it is a single book. One of the marks of Young Adult Fiction these days seems to be the requirement of everything to turn into an often too-long series. The rise and perhaps fall of the Queen of this genre, J.K. Rowling, I believe, attests to that. The Graveyard book creates just as interesting a world - a world beside and within our own, a world we all speculate about and perhaps do, perhaps to not want to believe in. But it is not an exploration of or expansion upon its world. It is simply a story, the story of a boy. It's story is told without assumption, and without formula. It is a coming of age story, that is for sure, it is about the progress from the cares and wonders of a child to a man, about important lessons learned along the way, and the friends that help you get there. There is adventure and there is mystery, bravery and cunning. But somehow, it is all set in a place that feels quite real. Like it could be the same winter sunrise, and the same summer sunset. The same brick houses and patch of nettles and grass. The same as wherever you are, really. Perhaps it comes from living in England for a time, but it all feels just familiar enough.

Mostly, I like the tone of the Graveyard Book. I like it's characters, yes, and its story. And perhaps the tone of Gaiman's voice helped, but I found the book exceedingly pleasant. It is a story you like hearing. I story where you care at every turn, without ever being worked up or agitated. It's odd to call it pleasant, as dark as it is, but it achieves both at the same time, in a way that leaves you feeling rather calm, and wanting a spot of tea, while at the same time preaching about the bright opportunity of life. The best way I can describe it is that it lets the pleasant be pleasant. It lets the melancholy be melancholy. Lets the macabre be macabre. It lets the simple be simple, lets the frightening be frightening, and the mundane be as it is.

One of the highest ways I can find to compliment something, or I should say, the thing I find I respect the most, is when a work of art accomplishes exactly what it set out to do. Achieves its potential, in a way only it can. When works fail to do this, I find myself a stream of suggestions - couldn't the characters have done this, and wouldn't it have been good if that - but with this book, I can think of none. It should be just as it is, and it is just as it should be. I am very glad I read it. It may not change my life, but it will change my day, and my week, and make them better for it. I may not dream of being Bod, may not stay up late swapping stories with friends based on his own or his world. But it's a story that will always be there for me, and which I would love to share.

I find that things like The Graveyard Book it is easy for this world to mock, or let go, or not care. It is easy to lose the importance of a simple "I enjoyed it!" in the flood of voices about this new film or that new comic. And there is nothing wrong with all the new things of course. But it was nice to have this pleasant little book to myself, for a time. Without anyone else's opinions. And nice to share it with you.

If you have time, I really do suggest The Graveyard Book. Especially the audio version, if you can.

And now I really must go and find some decent tea.

Thank you for reading.

Rissa

Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise him all creatures here below. Praise him above ye heavenly hosts. Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Amen.